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This blog's content might be triggering for some people, as it is related to eating and/or personality disorders. If you think this might be a wrong place for you, please, use your better judgment and leave.

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May 4, 2011

Deep in the ocean, treasure shines

I am so sorry for my mom. She doesn't have a single reason
to be proud when she thinks of me. That is why 
I'm so scared to have children myself.

And when she looks at me I doubt she sees the most beautiful
girl in the world. That is what daughters are supposed
to be - the most precious and the most beautiful
treasures. But I am only scrap covered with
rust that stands right next to the true
jewels my mother can never have.
She says nothing but she will
always compare and quietly
cry and wish she could
have anything
but me.

Why does my existence hurt her so much?
I wonder.

Love


~ Meg

5 comments:

  1. you have no idea how much i relate to this... other than feeling sorry for my mother. i feel s orry that shes too naive to understand the basic parts of life. but so is my life. hope youre well. <3

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  2. C'mon, mothers always nag about us, but I'm sure your mom's proud of you!
    Oh, and can't wait to see the pic of your prom dress!!
    xoxo
    Lucy

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  3. Hey, don't think like that! I'm sure she is proud of you! I know it can feel like your not good enough and your letting her down sometimes, I have felt the same, but I'm sure she doesn't think that at all. You are amazing and she has every reason to be proud of you! All relationships have their ups and downs, but honestly, she will always love you no matter what, so don't worry :)
    Stay strong,
    Lottie x

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  4. moms can be tough and harsh sometimes. but I think moms are tough because they want to see the best out of their daughters. Even if she seems like she doesn't approve it might just be because she's pushing you to be better. just make sure when you try to please her that you're also going for what you want most. no use achieving dreams that aren't yours.

    I don't really understand motherly pressures and feelings of disappointment since I can't really relate, but I feel like I can sympathize. but best wishes to you in dealing with her.

    lots of love,
    Jackie

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  5. i'm deeply hurt with this, meg. i wish i can hug you right now... i'm speechless, darling... i'm so sorry.

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