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This blog's content might be triggering for some people, as it is related to eating and/or personality disorders. If you think this might be a wrong place for you, please, use your better judgment and leave.

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April 25, 2011

If only breathing wasn't so hard

It is one of those days when I move but barely feel, which is a good thing, I guess. Numbness became very pleasant. I welcome it with open arms. I am comfortably numb, as Pink Floyd would say. But there is a certain uneasy feeling somewhere inside me and I wish I could figure out what it is.

I don't feel like going to school tomorrow. There are only three more weeks left. I can't wait to get out of high school. Everybody seems to be so distant. But distance is better than intimacy. I don't know what to talk to people about anyway.

Little things make me so sad - when somebody forgets to smile, when I hear people laughing and I'm not there, old people at crosswalks, homeless people, etc.
What are some little things that make you sad?

I wrote another letter - to my sisters. You can read it here.

Love


~ Meg

8 comments:

  1. you're so lucky to get out, I have one more year left in highschool, fucking hell hole.

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  2. oh, you are too lovely for words, meg... btw, may i ask if you are the girl in that photo under the word SATURDAY SECRETS... because i will be featuring you in my blog and taking your permission to publish your photo :)

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  3. i would be very happy if you send me some, beb! haze.marion@gmail.com thanks for the wonderful words... love, love, love you :)

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  4. I supose numb is better than hurting. I don't want to go back to school either :/
    What makes me sad? Seeing people trample flowers always gets me wound ip. People have no respect for them.
    Stay strong,
    Lottie x

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  5. hey sweetie..im sorry to hear your not feeling great.
    I remember the state of numbness...i kinda liked it...weird!

    i get sad at things like that too...butchers also make me sad but I think thats a veggie thing.
    x

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  6. Just started following your blog - love it - always nice to find someone with identical stats! so sorry you're feeling sad......my blog pretty much reads the same today.....hope you make it thru the day :)

    I find myself crying over some of the silliest things and I'm glad to see I'm not the only one. Last week I found myself weeping during a Simpons episode....yeah....thought that was pretty bad. *sigh*

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  7. I'm not a very rational person so it's not certain things that make me sad, just a switch that goes off in my head. I'm not sure if thats makes sense to anyone.

    Sorry about the numbness. I hope you feel (better) soon!

    love,
    Jackie

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  8. You are such a good sister... <3


    I know how you feel, Hon...
    sometimes life is so bitter sweet...

    Some little things that make me sad are
    dying flowers, worms on the sidewalk after a big rain, crying children, and growing up... <3

    I hope you find the beauty in the world, my dear - because you deserve it... <3

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~ You brigthen my day. Thank you for doing that. Stay lovely. ~