I live in a world I don't know anymore. My mind and heart gradually lead me to my own grave. I am already halfway there, in my coffin; the lid is open but I'm not buried yet. I don't want help but I don't want to be like this either.
It is the worst feeling in the world to lose a child, something worth crying your heart out. The thought about breaking your heart breaks mine. I am sorry mama; I love you and always will. I am scared for I know you'll suffer and I never ever want to hurt you. But the desire to die is so much stronger.
I am scared.